I'll just give you a quick one. So my favorite one for regulating is belly breathing. And a lot of people say, Oh, I know belly breathing, it's just deep breathing. No belly breathing is different belly breathing is on the inhale, you stick your tummy out as far as you can. Whereas deep breathing is you're filling your lungs as big as you can.
So it's different. So I'll just actually I'll do it with you guys. If you want to put one hand on your chest, one hand on your tummy. And this is great when you're feeling anxious when you feel like you're about to lose your temper with your kids or your partner.
So your bottom hand on your tummy on the inhale, you're going to push it out as far as you can, and try to count into four ready, so we'll go 1234 and sticking your tongue out like you're trying to pregnant almost, and then try to hold 234 then exhale. 1234.
And if you just you just keep doing that, and I'll talk as you do that, what you'll notice is you'll notice that actual like calm down Your whole nervous system, because there's a nerve that connects to your diaphragm, to your amygdala. So when you breathe like this, you are opening up your diaphragm and you're expanding your ribs and your lungs to a point that's not normal, right?
If you're running from a tiger, you're breathing short, sharp, fast and shallow. amygdala, here's that message, right when you're breathing, and thinks, oh, crap, we're in danger. Where's the tiger? Right? But if you're breathing like this, that's so slow. so relaxed. Does that make sense? Yeah, so yeah, your breathing actually tells you brain how to feel or how to think exactly triggers.
That's really cool is why it's so annoying when people are having a panic attack and someone says to them, just take a few deep breaths. Mm hmm. That's like the intention is good. But that's not actually the why the why is because we want to calm your amygdala down who's the one who's freaked out when you're having a panic attack. And the best way to communicate to amygdala is speak its language, which is often physical.
So saying because it's primal, right, if you tell your amygdala, but really it's not going to hurt you coronas just happening elsewhere. It's not here, you're okay. And Mikela doesn't talk, and maybe it was a lizard. So you have to talk to it in the lizard way, which is nice, big, deep breaths, nice, relaxing, and then that's how it will calm down.
So before, I'm going to have a challenging phone call, before I go on stage, if I'm doing a presentation, anytime I start to feel a little bit elevated, or when I can tell them about to yell at my kids, I just stop and go. And I just do some belly breaths, and you can feel it immediately shift like your physiology just go. And it just takes you down a notch so you're not so close to boiling point.
And this is something you can teach your kids when I have taught it to my kids and clients, we lay on the floor, we put a stuffed animal on our belly and then on that inhale, when you're trying to do Make your belly stick out, you try to knock the stuffed animal off. And even the position of hand on Tommy hand on heart is a really comforting position. And you can feel it like as you do it because it just sort of feels like a hug and it's just a soothing way to kind of just comfort yourself.
So I do that with adult clients it with if I'm having a session with an adult, and they're really dysregulated and really upset because they're telling me a story about something that happened, it was really hard. I'll just stop them and just say, okay, just take a second to just put a hand on your tummy and one hand on your heart. Just give it some breath. Just slow it down. And then that just that really regulating and really calming. And same with your kids. So I've taught this to my kids that when they're really upset or really angry. I'll say Look, why don't we just put our hands on a tummy and have a heart. Let's just take a few belly breaths.
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